Tags

,

The Martyrdom of Saint Sebastian by Honore Daumier

The Martyrdom of Saint Sebastian by Honore Daumier

At least since December, when Chiron and Neptune entered each other’s orb, we’ve seen an ongoing test of our connection to reality. Now, everyone has areas they’d rather not look at too closely, places in our lives where we keep our perceptions in soft focus around the edges. I’m not speaking of those things we accept or let pass or don’t inspect too minutely, out of an already full life plate, or the simple reluctance to admit something isn’t perfect–that’s not only human, it’s probably vital to healthy functioning, as we could be easily overwhelmed by too much detail, too many things to ‘fix.’ I’m talking about those few of us with a relational disconnect in the overall world view, where the individual’s idea of who they are, and who others are, is deeply and fundamentally off.

This conjunction was early on imbued with both a spirit of Self and aggression and a mentality that framed dissonance as a personal power struggle, with the transits of both Mars and Juno to this combo.

The energy became more prominent as Jupiter neared the conjunction of Chiron/ Neptune; its presence boosts the need to project, to broadcast, related ideas and concepts as a means of expressing one’s belief in them, and thereby, at least to the mind that’s confused, proving their validity–it’s a Self-righteous energy that feeds on belief/ faith in an ideal that does not correlate to the reality picture. Jupiter also brings in the social element, the possibility of reaching out and imposing the ideas in the social sphere, again as an expression of their ‘truth’–“I wouldn’t be able to say this publicly if it weren’t true!”

The big problem with all of this is, Chiron and Neptune both hold expression pitfalls for those who are prone to fantasy, delusion, obfuscation, as the conjunction marries the urge to embrace illusion with the primal wound, the sense of hurt that, if left unclaimed and unexplored by the individual, becomes ripe for projection, and that is essentially what we’ve been seeing the past few months, an insistent sense of victimhood which has taken (temporary) hold of a dispiriting few.

How do we sort ‘true’ victims (as there are those who suffer legitimately at the hands of others) from those who have simply taken the worldview that they are victims, fueled by the easy Self-empathy of a complete mis-perception of role, actions, or intents? One easy way is to ask, where does this person ‘live’? Is their sense of Self seated in a me (or us) v. them mentality, where they are ‘done to,’ where others have bad intent, where they are a crusader for good and right in the face of those who are insensitive bullies? In this regard, anyone who disowns the potential to be the aggressor themselves becomes a candidate.

This is not, on its own, definitive, as there certainly are bullies, insensitive louts, and those who mean us harm, and sometimes the world does divide up into sides. There are other factors that distinguish those who are suffering under this transit (and suffer they do, as the pain they feel is real–the problem comes with their clear misunderstanding of where it originates). One distinguishing trait is, they are the aggressor–they pick the fight, typically based on an indignant reaction to what someone else has said or done that violates their delusional sense of Self. Often this has been sought out–the Neptune-challenged individual goes looking for a savior, or at least someone to support their fantasy Self, and when the mirror the other person holds up doesn’t show them the illusion they expect–well it must be that person’s fault, right there–the reflection is wrong, the mirror is wrong, and the person holding the mirror is wrong–because, they firmly believe, it couldn’t be them–in fact, that’s a basic assumption they enter the situation with, that in no way are they misguided, or have anything to learn–a real irony when the situation is a teaching or guidance one.

It’s also common that the person they choose to blame is someone ‘safe,’ someone who will likely not reject them, or who is not involved in the real problem. It’s almost a form of scapegoating, the ancient practice of designating someone or something as the carrier of all the village’s problems and sins, and then driving the bearer out of town–in this case the ‘village’ being the Neptune-influenced individual, who does not recognize the internal schism that prevents acknowledging the problem as their own.

How do you know when you are dealing with someone thus afflicted? “You think” may be the first words of many of their sentences–they speak as if they’re psychic (Neptune, again!) and yet what you’re hearing has no relation to what’s actually in your mind or heart–and you quickly discover that contradicting them brings out the emotional flood, anger or hurt, one and the same. They come at you claiming a wound, blaming the hurt on you, and yet this doesn’t make sense–it’s like they’ve set off huge emotional smoke bombs, deflecting attention from the real source of upset, determined to extract energy, attention, and penance from the accused–and if you’re the accused, you may think they have a point–until you realize that you are not reacting from emotion, or a need to Self-defend, and that even offered apologies or clear explanations as to your intent are ignored–the individual has a stake in taking a stance that demands you accept their indignation, and that you be responsible for their hurt, even if it doesn’t make sense, and it’s the one-sided, punishing nature of the interaction that is your biggest and best clue that this person is under the Neptune/ Chiron spell, using you as a screen for projection and Self-justification. Even those who claim to speak for the oppressed can be subject to this–for just as likely that they are correct in their remarks is the possibility that they are taking a passive-aggressive tack toward judgment and blame, typically engaging in precisely what they accuse others of.

It’s a sad situation; it can bring to ruin perfectly good relationships, as the Neptune individual does not, will not, cannot allow themselves to see the imperfection in their reasoning–as that would require a release of the illusion of victimhood–and right now, for them, that just feels too good, too safe, and perhaps is the only way they can feel right.

And to those who may feel injury at the hands of others, it’s good to remember, that no one can injure you without your consent.

You may want to check out several of the excellent posts here http://questionofmindfulness.wordpress.com/ as they touch on the same topic, and offer some facets I might have missed.